Chapter 2: The Curse
Archaeological Museum of Naples / Photo by Robin Dawes
Welcome to my blog: The Canine Bible where I translate the book of Genesis as if God is humanity and humanity are dogs.
Here in my second posting we get the story of Adam and Eve. This was a fun one! Not only is cooked meat far more desirable than an apple in my opinion but in my research, the Hebrew translation that we use for “snake” literally translated reads “the one who hisses”. Now, I am no linguist but if that is the case than a cat really could be the one who deceived Eve! Snakes could just be hairless, legless cats!
As always I’d love to hear your questions and thoughts! If you like what you are reading, check out my zines. Some of these chapters are illustrated!
1 This is the account of the first dogs when they were formed.
2 The gods formed dogs out of wolves and breathed into their nostrils the breath of life. And dogs became different beings.
3 Now the gods had denned in a land full of all kinds of trees and shrubs that were good for livestock to eat. Here the gods brought the first dogs. In the middle of the gods’ pack, a dead tree brought forth the first light. This was the tree of the knowledge of the cooked meats.
4 A river ran through the gods’ home and every beast of the field and of the air and of the stream that were good for eating dwelled there. And the gods commanded the dogs “You are free to eat of any beast in the land but you must not eat of the tree of the cooked meats for when you eat of it, you will surly die.” The gods took the dogs and told them to watch over the beasts. They brought the scraps of each animal to see what the dogs would think of them. So the dogs came to rely on the gods to provide for them the scraps they liked best.
5 Neither the stud nor the bitch wore collars and they were not ashamed.
6 Now the one who hisses was more crafty than any of the wild animals the gods had allowed in their land. He, being a cat, said to the bitch, “Did the gods really say, ‘You must not eat any of the wild animals that eat from the trees of this land?’”
7 The bitch said to the cat, “We may eat any animal we desire, but the gods did say, ‘You must not eat the meat from the tree that burns in the middle of the pack, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’”
8 “You will not surely die,” the cat said to the bitch. “For the gods know when you eat of its meat, your eyes will be opened, and you will be like the gods, knowing a good dog from a bad one.”
9 When the bitch saw that the cooked meat from the burning tree was good for food and very pleasing to the nose, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some of the meat and ate it. She also drug some to her mate who was with her and he ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened and they realized they were bad dogs.
10 Then the stud and the bitch heard the sound of the gods as they walked amongst the trees in the cool of the day, and they hid from the gods amongst the forest. But the gods called to the dogs, “Where are you?”
11 The stud answered, “I heard you walking through the trees and I was afraid because I am a bad dog; so I hid.”
12 And the gods said, “Who told you that you are a bad dog? Have you eaten from the tree of the cooked meats that we commanded you not to eat from?”
13 The stud said, “The bitch you put here with me – she gave me some cooked meat from the dead tree and I ate it.”
14 Then the gods said to the bitch, “What is this you have done?”
15 The bitch said, “The cat deceived me and I ate.”
16 So the gods said to the cat, “Because you have done this,
17 “Cursed are you above all the livestock and all the wild animals! You will lick the fur off your coat and swallow it whole all the days of your life, causing you to puke wretchedly from your stomach. And I will put enmity between you and the bitch and between your offspring and hers; he will bite your head but you will scratch his heel.”
18 To the bitch the gods said, “We will greatly increase how many pups you will bear and you will struggle to take care of them all. Your title will be a word of slander amongst the gods and will be used to humiliate and rule over you.”
19 And to the stud the gods said, “Because you listened to your stomach and ate from the dead tree of cooked meats which we commanded you, ‘You must not eat of it,’ cursed is a dog’s share of meats because of you; through learning tricks and obeying orders you will eat only the scraps of the gods all the days of your life. We will produce harnesses and whistles for you and you will eat dried flesh infused with plants of the field. As slaves you will eat your food until you return to the ground, for dust you are and to dust you will return.”
20 The gods made collars for the stud and the bitch and fastened these upon their necks. And the gods said to each other, “The dogs have developed taste like us, knowing cooked meat from raw meat. They must not be allowed to reach out their snouts and steal from our store houses and keep us from living forever.” So the gods banished the first dogs from their homes and put them to work. After they drove the dogs out, they placed chains on poles and doors to their dens to guard the way to the tree of cooked meats. But the cat always found a way inside.
